Lost his mind . . .
As an active Witness for over thirty years, and one who continues to be happily active, I have never once discouraged anyone from asking questions, nor have I criticized anyone for having doubts, no matter if they are doubts about Scripture, teachings, the Watchtower Society, etc. Questions are good. Doubts are healthy. When one asks questions stemming from doubt, it's evidence that they are loving God "with their whole mind" rather than with a suspended intellect. (see Mark 12:30)
Now, as far as your husband is concerned, I obviously don't know the entire story, and for that matter it's none of my business. From the very little you've written about the situation and the manner in which you write about your husband, my impression is that there has already been some friction existing in the marriage for some time (though this is not to infer you have a bad marriage by any means) and that perhaps the differences you and your husband have about Jehovah's Witnesses are a symptom of that friction rather than the cause. Again, all I can go by is the little you've written.
But in all honesty I did notice something curious in some of the things you've stated.
By your account, Jehovah's Witnesses are a controlling entity, a cult, a manipulative organization that threatens expelling any brother or sister who doesn't "toe the line" of Watchtower doctrine or doesn't bow mindlessly to the Governing Body's will.
Yet I noticed the following in what you wrote:
I have told him that if he gets baptized I will leave. I have a hard enough time dealing with him now, I have no idea what it would be like in full blown cult mode. They will not come to the house anymore because I ask to me questions and told them they were liars the last time they were here. I asked them who their mediator was and they said Jesus and I said they were either lying or not reading their own literature. The elder called me a hateful woman and said he would not be back. I said that would be glorious. Unfortunately, my nephew was with the elder, and the hubby backs up the hateful woman comment.
I have managed to keep him away from meetings for 2 years but he still reads their crap daily.
Threatening to leave your husband if he gets baptized sounds very controlling. Is this not the same kind of controlling behavior that you accuse the Watchtower Society of engaging in? Cutting ties if a member engages in activities that don't sit well with Watchtower preference?
Even though you directly asked two Witnesses about their belief, and even though they directly answered you that Jesus is our mediator (which is, in fact, true; Jesus is our mediator; 1 Timothy 2:5, 6), you nonetheless called them liars. Is that not what people accuse the Watchtower Society of doing, calling people liars?
You were called hateful by an elder who also happens to be your nephew (which, again, suggests family-related friction over and above any doctrinal or theological disagreements), and then expressed that your "hubby" agreed with your nephew. By doing this you're negatively categorizing your husband and your nephew based on the fact that they oppose your position and manner. Is this not what people accuse the Watchtower Society of doing, negatively categorizing people who oppose its position?
Finally you mention that you've "managed to keep your husband away" from meetings for two years, but that he continues to read Watchtower literature. This sounds, again, very controlling. Matched with your threat of divorce, it comes off as extremely manipulative. Isn't manipulation exactly what people accuse the Watchtower Society of engaging in?
Control. Negative categorizing. Manipulation. Threats of cutting ties.
Whether done by an organization or by an individual, it's all the same.
Again, none of us knows the entire story of you and your husband's issues (and clearly we don't have your husband's side of the story), and it's none of our business. But based only on the little you've chosen to reveal thus far, perhaps you may wish to consider the possibility that your husband (with his pro-JW stance) isn't the only source of the problems you're experiencing.